im smiling for you. im smiling with you except once again the jokes on me.
built my walls on hate. told myself no just go. have fun let loose and now i find myself doing things for you i normally wouldnt. sitting on your bed telling you i was going out yesterday, the cold look and answers you gave me froze me in place. i irritate you to no ends, piss you off unexpectedly and normally i wouldnt give a shit because who the hell are you to me? and likewise i am nobody to you. and that is how you like it.
today i said 5 years down the road im going to see you and you’re going to forget who i ever was just like every other one you have. without a hint of hesitation you said most likely and for some reason i smiled. an affectionate smile. i think you noticed because after that you said, you? i think you i will remember. it didnt mean anything. it doesnt mean anything. so why even bother?
we always want what we can’t have.
and i should know this by now.
so why do i let my mask slowly fall like raindrops against a window pane.
i’m falling.
and i cant help it. and i know you will hate me for it.
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