I never really knew how it happened. All i remember was finding myself at your house in the middle of the night again crying my eyes out over something i dont even remember now. Someone else was with me as always with every instance we randomly appeared at odd hours on days you had to work. Never once did you turn us down, and soon habit became a daily thing and your place was known as our comfort house.

I broke down that night, cried in loud rasping breathes and scared you with that. You held me tight and told me it was okay and that’s how she found us on the couch, a knowing smile on her face. I felt my heart beat pick up thinking it was just because of all the crying i was doing. It took me sometime later to realise that’s when it started. How that little comfort hug became what was later known as Us in the weeks that soon came.

It is at our lowest points that we constantly pull at the glimmering threads of memories that will either lift us or break us.

How every touch, kiss and smile would flicker across the back of our heads like a movie scene being replayed over and over again. Every finger clapsed against the other and every little trace of scent.

The newer the memory made, the fresher it plays its games with my incoherent thoughts.

The sunlight streaming in, us lying on our backs hand in hand on the warm wooden boards with a breeze rarely felt. No words spoken, there wasnt a need for it. It wasnt quiet but it was peaceful and for that half an hour we were lost in our own little bubble of a world where only our presence left tell tale signs of reality. A slight roll to my right brought me next to you. My head on its familiar place by your shoulder and the sound of your rhythmic breathing right above my forehead. It had been months since we last reveled in each others company that way but instead of a smile, today it drifts about in my daydreams like a ghost without mercy.

Today i am still waiting. Unconsciously. For what its worth, this time i havent the faintest clue.

And time continues to crawl by in that mocking way it always does without you.

* David Tao – Liu Sha =’) *