Life's Bittersweet Simplicities

Archive for November, 2010

Nothing and Everything

It wasn’t too long back when someone made me notice something about life that seemed almost rightfully wrong. It made perfect sense to return everything the world has given us back to its rightful cycle.

We start off having nothing and begin our lives trying to gain things; be it friends, education or even superficial things. Somewhere in the first quarter of our lives, we are almost on top of the world possessing  more things than we could really need. In most cases anyway. Yet as we grow older and pass the halfway mark, we are unconsciously required to trade our gifts for newer gifts which we never really know to what extent is the exchange so much more valuable. At some point, we begin to lose the people close to us through old age and death or just the passing and going of friends and then we lose even ourselves. We return what we have learnt back and our vision begins to impair and go away. Everything we ever had in the end eventually becomes nothing.

So we start with nothing, gain everything and finally end once again with nothing.

But how do we figure out when to let go of certain things in our lives in order to reach that end. Do we hold on forcefully, unwilling to ever let go of anything we ever had until it’s time or do we allow ourselves to let them slip casually by with ease and an understanding that everything must eventually be returned?

All my rooms are filled with musty dust
Time has taken all that I possess
I never know if to laugh or to scream
To hate or to believe

Daughter Darling-Broken Bridge

What do we give up? What do we keep? Is there ever really a right and a wrong?

Why are emotions such messy things. Why do they behave like a wildfire in a forest despite the attempts to keep them in?

Or am i just weak?

November has been a painful month for me.

It should have been perfect.

posted by BabyGin in confessions,emo,lyrics,musings,personal,reminders,sad,tragedies,upset,wordy and have No Comments

Domo Shoot Teaser

225-IMG_4299 - Copy

Gahahaha. ANother round of random casual photoshoot coming up… I HOPE….

Sorry lar. got a ridiculous amount of pics in this set and although most of them are damn similiar but its still very hard to decide on which to edit and post =X

Yah yah. i posted a few pics from this set before i know. no need to remind me.

So stay tuned!

*innocent face*

posted by BabyGin in photoshoot,pics,toys and have Comments (2)

Liese Bubble Hair Dye Chassis Berry

As an official blog bribe because i’ve been seriously neglecting this space and pretty much archiving it with way overdued pics im going to put something relatively new here.

a beauty item review!!!

and i know la. the whole world has done it an blogged about it all already but if you know me well enough im probably one of the laziest females on earth that thinks beauty regimes are a chore not worth completing on a daily basis =X so lagilah lazy plus dont have my desktop takde semangat wanna blog but can do review some more! well sort of a review lar. ish.

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this is my original hair colour. i had it dyed a brown red but before that my hair was dyed black so the colours didnt seep in well enough and it wasnt red enough for me. and also my hairstylist and bf refused to let me further torture my hair with bleach so i had to make due with this only mildly lighter shade of brown =X with very little red tinge u___u sad. totally wasnt what i was expecting.

click to enlarge to have a clearer pic of the colour.

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got the brightest reddest one that was apparently available. casis berry colour from sasa. cant remember how much it was. RM35 maybe??

before beginning, you are suppose to do a little test patch first to see if any allergy occurs. me being lazy as always, couldnt even be bothered and just took the risk anyway but my skin is not particularly sensitive to these kinda things so i guess it was okay for me.

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Sasa was having a promotion where they gave me this free cape thingie so the dye doesn’t stain my clothes =D please note it does not come with the hair dye but it was a free gift promotion thing. you might also want to wear an old shirt you dont really care about anymore just in case ya.

it is also advisable to line the edges of ure skin that comes in contact with your hair with some baby oil so the dye does not stain your skin if it overflows a little. the area behind the ears and the back of the neck especially because we tend to not notice when theres dye stuck there.

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the things that were found in the pack. instructions. the dye. some mixer with the dye. the foam nozzle. gloves and some conditioner lotion thing for after care.

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first, pour the dye carefully into the bottle containing the white liquid.

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close the cap and tilt the bottle upside down gently in order to mix the two solutions. do this multiple times until the soltuion is evenly coloured indicating that it’s been mixed well.

DO NOT SHAKE THE BOTTLE. I REPEAT! DO NOT SHAKE THE BOTTLE!! shaking it will cause the foam to occur in the bottle before it is pumped out. this will cause the foam to become very watery when you use the pump and thats dangerous since it might drip into your eyes as well as pretty much useless later.

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remove the cap and replace it with the pump given. okay i wanted to make a GIF image to show you but im using the bf laptop and i dont have my programmes so too bad. we all know what happens when i drag it. lol. this post would never have appeared.

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put on your gloves and you’re just about all geared to go!

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one thing i noticed though is the longer i left the dye, the darker the solution became. im not sure if its better to use it when its lighter or darker but most likely it doesnt make a difference.

to use the pump, press the plastic bottle with the bottle upright. its not like a shampoo bottle where you press on the nozzle so do read your instructions properly and dont let yourself get confused.

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with your foamy palms, start massaging the foam into your hair starting from the top and slowly going towards the base. for me the first half of the bottle was actually used up before any foam started to show. it made me panic because i thought i was doing it wrong but after using more of the solution and massaging it in more the foam finally started appearing.

theres an indicator on the bottle stating how much of the solution you should use depending on your hair length. it wasnt necessary for me to finish it with my length but i figured might as well use it all since it cant be reused again.

after youre done, just pile everything on your head so the foam doesnt fall all over the place or touch any of your clothing.

a lot of people have told me that the ammonia smell was really bad for this product but funny enough neither me nor my bf thought so. we actually found that this one smelled quite nice and the berry smell was really really strong. it could also be due to the fact that we have an air purifier in the room so im not entirely sure. however the fumes did sting my eyes and nose a little when i got too close to it like when im applying the foam on my fringe but it was manageable.

head also felt slightly tingle somewhere in the middle but it was just a mild sensation. ive gone through a lot worst dying my hair all these years in saloons.

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leave on the foam for 20-30 minutes. 30 if you have darker hair and then just wash off like normal using your shampoo and conditioner. i expected my hair to become all dry and frizzled but it was fine. no dramatic changes to the texture of my hair. use your own leave on conditioner for double safety or just apply the leave in conditioner provided with the hair dye =)

tried to take pic of the after colour but the room lighting was horrible and the flash just made it worst.

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it doesnt look like much difference from the original but it was definitely a lot brighter and redder. it also became slightly lighter and overall i was pretty happy with the results. still not as bright and light as i want it to be but what do you expect for a hair dye that cost that much for home use? and i still need to constantly remind myself that my hair was dyed black previously.

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the lightness is more obvious in this pic but it was still really hard to capture the actual colour.

all in all, i guess i would say i was satisfied with the overall results.

sadly, the colour doesnt really last and after a month there is almost no more red in my hair and it’s started to darken back to its original brown. im not sure if anyone else has this problem but red generally becomes brown on asian hair anyway so who am i to complain. at least it didnt cost me a bomb like it would have in the hands of more professional hair colourist.

posted by BabyGin in asian,camwhore,pics,review and have No Comments

Random #25494352

Wow. I think I see spiders and cobwebs in that corner.

Perhaps if we flip some pictures over and look under those letters, I’m pretty sure dust bunnies can be found over breeding themselves *ahem*

Don’t worry poor blog.

I still love you ♥

Posted with WordPress for BlackBerry.

posted by BabyGin in funny,random,stupidity and have No Comments

I am?

Insensitive.

Materialistic.

Immature.

Neither compassionate nor understanding.

Selfish.

Egotistical.

Shallow.

Uncaring.

Manipulative.

Sly.

And in short, just bad in every way humanly possible.

When the person we trust most tells us this constantly in every fight that happens on such regular intervals, we start to doubt our own credibility and begin to hate ourselves in a light that only gives off what one could only desribe as bad energy. Every little scrap of self dignity and love is taken away from our fragile self and we begin even to believe in those words thrown thoughtlessly at us before forgetting who we truly are in the end.

And in this cruel process of love and hate, we seek out comfort from the one that brought us to such a level hoping that we are still actually loved. But as fate would have it, life is never ever that simple and instead the question of our self worth appears distorted by the words of angry malice and begins its game of hide and seek with our conscienceness.

The train of thoughts begin as we question our very existance and shrink into our little world of black and white voids that eat into our souls, centimeter by centimeter until there is nothing left and a disaster is born.

4 years.

4 years and all that was rebuilt is slowly falling apart.

I know this person. I’ve met this person. You’ve recreated this person.

Being bad really is easier than good. And the realisation hits so fast and hard, you are lost. Lost in the battle of virtues, believes and ideals.

Posted with WordPress for BlackBerry.

posted by BabyGin in confessions,musings,personal,upset,wordy and have No Comments