In fact, i take that as one of my more advanced skill levels. This probably sounds very unconvincing to any future employers i may have but fear not as this only applies to things that i do for myself.

So anyway, in just the running span of 48 hours, i have amazingly managed to get myself busier than i can handle with my superb procrastination level.

2 assignments, an exam, vanity dreams, a short story competition, a pretty tedious copyriting job, family obligations, some stupid career counseling thing for college and another freelance stand and  look pretty job. ALL by Tuesday!

WHEEE!!!!!!!!!!

But you see ah, i promised to update my blog and im here updating now. I know its way later than expected BUT STILL sooner than usual lately.

There’s actually a ton of things i want to blog about lately but these occurrences always happen when im doing something else. Someone seriously needs to invent some blogging mechanism that can read brainwaves or something. WTF.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

I WANT TO BUM BY THE BEACH AND SIP ON COCONUTS! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

I get how people that have been hurt or whatever it is hold grudges and have a tendency to avoid the party that had inflicted the pain or whatever but to hold on to that grudge like somebody murdered your family for the fun of it is just fucking irritating. Yeah okay, be pissed off. In fact be really pissed of for a year or so but to continue being pissed off and refusing to let go to the extent of constantly avoiding that person and even causing those around you agitation or discomfort at the mentioning of said person’s name is just taking it too far.

Hey.

THE PAST IS THE PAST.

DEAL WITH IT NOW instead of fucking around with your present and future.

People never realize how by dragging in their past into their present they end up muddling everything together and thus causing an even bigger effect than originally intended which would really screw their future over.

BLAH BLAH BLAH.

Im getting more worked up typing about this but i just want to say this to the person who pushed me to this point today.

DO YOU HAVE ANY FUCKING IDEA HOW I FEEL KNOWING THAT SOMETHING SO LONG AGO STILL HAS SUCH AN ADVERSE AFFECT ON YOU? where the hell does that put me then? that at the end of the day, i am still never going to be above that or important enough for you to focus on me instead of something that happened in the past? People change, situations change but holding on to something that is no longer there is only going to create a time capsule of continuous pain.

I dont even know what to say to you anymore. Its not like you ever listen or that you even care enough to consider my feelings anyway.

*note to all my readers: this probably sounds like a rant about a bfs ex gf or something but no. not really. thats not it. i shall leave it somewhat cryptic. le sigh.*

not too long back the bf decided to bring some random fish home because he refuses to let me keep my guppies as they all had a sudden death when i went to aussieland last year. the fishie he brought home wasnt eating much despite it being an omnivorous fish.

so a few days back i saw the most DISGUSTING and long worm wriggling about outside. YES I HATE WORMS AND THINGS THAT WRIGGLE LIKE MAGGOTS!! give me spiders and lizards any day (i actually like them). Also, after absorbing this information about me, please throw it back out and forget it so you do not use it against me one day. ANYWAY, back to the story so i started going eww and made gagging sounds until the boyfriend came and said EH GO CATCH IT AND FEED TO THE FISH!

this of course sparked a series of OMG and NO WAY from me because seriously i am not going to pick that disgusting wriggly thing up so he went and got it and fed it to the fish. WAHLAH! fish very aggressively ate the friggin worm which was over 10cm long!! at first i was just happy because the poor skinny thing finally decided to swallow something and then it hit me. OMG THE POOR INNOCENT WORM!! all it was doing was wriggling its way back into the dirt from the tiles and in a flurry of unknown movements, it’s being drowned in water and suddenly ends up being bitten and swallowed by a fish with teeth! …. i was genuinely appalled at the whole idea of how i may have just contributed to the death of the very disgusting worm in such a torturous manner!! .___. drowning and being beheaded via bites is pretty hell fucked up aye.

and then yesterday another depressing though dawned upon me.

if most of you dont already know, the current place im living in is literally infested with mosquitoes so in order to help elevate this problem we have mosquito traps. the kind where the light and co2 attracts the mozzies and then it gets sucked into the trap and can’t escape. i’ve had it for a while now and ive never had any qualms about squishing and killing mosquitoes because they really piss the hell out of me (i am a walking mosquito attraction). so anyway the first trap we had was just like that and one sucked it they cant escape. my mum got me another one where you can put sticky paper at the bottom so the trap doesnt need to be continuously on (if u switch it off the fan stops so the mozzies can fly back out) since the mozzies get stuck on the paper.

i opened the trap to count how many mosquitoes there were and a few of them were still alive trying their best to escape T___T and i got hit by another level of guilt trippin. I AM TORTURING THE MOSQUITOES!!! you see, if i had a zapper or if i squished them, it would be an instant death. no suffering no nothing but these so called eco friendly traps work by trapping the mosquitoes and then they eventually die from dehydration!! BUT OMG CAN U IMAGINE HOW TRAGIC IT IS?!?! i am actually causing the mosquitoes to slowly dehydrate and die from it in a slow and depressing manner T_____T

now im in such a dilemma i don’t know what to do because the stupid voice in my head won’t stop mocking me T___T

i am evil.

i feel evil.

somebody help me. PFFT

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA damn you conscience!!

actually i shouldnt even be blogging right now but i can’t help myself. I’ve had a rather depressing day with barely anytime for myself so here i am ranting away and letting the world know about the tragedies that seem to like befalling careless ginny and how her day was filled with forgetfulness and tragedies D=

im pretty careless normally but today i seemed to be at higher form than usual WTF

So as usualy la im the queen of last minute assignment wan. so last night cannot sleep properly cuz brain was partially in panic mode but overall i was just too tired to continue so pandai pandai lah go wake up this morning and do. VERY GOOD. finished the assignment with an hour to spare before class starts! actually i thought class was starting an hour earlier (i saw the wrong time on my watch) and went into panic frenzy mode because i thought i was late and while in the spur of frenzies note printings, i didnt noticed that i printed abt 30 PDF files wrongly…. so i had to throw them all aside (to be used a scrap paper) and reprint them in the correct order and alignment again. WUWUUW

den nvm i had to study for quiz then my lecturer said read this article thingie so okay la i go baca la. den because i had an hour to spare i read slowly all thinking that was all i needed to read. 45 mins b4 class i decide okay la im gonna go class early today but packed up my stuff all and then i was left with half an hour.

so i drive to college and lo and behold. tragedy. no parking in my usual spot. rounded for over 20 mins. finally got a parking somewhere much further than i normally park. rushed to class and i was only 5 mins late and quiz already started. TRAGEDY AGAIN. only 1 question from the quiz came form the stupid article. eveyrthing else was from last weeks class which i didnt even bother to read because it was the first time my lecturer sent out a msg telling us that the article reading will be in our quiz. WTF. in panic frenzied mode i could not think and literally almost eveyrthing wrong when in truth they were all very simple answers and i knew them like the back of my hand but the disorientation and rush i was in made my answers go whacked as well.

AND THEN i wanted to whip my phone out to twitter about my tragedy and i realised i left my freaking phone at home?!?!? HOMAIGAD!! tragedy max because immediately after class i was suppose to meet some friends and we hadnt decided on a spot and i didnt have their nos! so i borrowed my friends laptop to attempt to go into fb in hopes they would be online and when the laptop came into my lap the internet decides to fuck up and i cannot sign into my FB T___T

not long after i go down and hand up my assignment that i had not stapled because i wasnt sure if they needed this one extra piece (i brought a staple n staples thinking im damn smart) hand up that time i realise OH FML. NO WONDER IT FELT WEIRD THAT I HAD to write my group mates name n IDS at random places. I FORGOT THE FREAKING COVER PAGE?!?! I MEAN SERIOUSLY??! WHO FORGETS COVER PAGES?!?! sigh. lecturer doesnt realise and i hope she doesnt minus any marks for that U__U or im gonna feel so guilty. but thats not really our final assignment anyway. she makes us hand in weekly basis so our tutor can check on our stuff before the final compilation. I THINK. so she cant really minus marks for me forgetting a cover page right T_T the names and IDs are on all other pages. zzz

so in my stressed mode i skipped half my class drove all the way back because my appt was in abt 45 mins. found my phone told them what happen and collected myself for a while before going out again.

new tragedy arises.

i go out and realise the main gate is open….. it didnt shut when i pressed the remote earlier and because i was in such a rush i didnt turn around to double check and the dog went out when he normally stays in even if the door is open T_T and so i am alte to meet my friends and i spent a good 15-20 mins running around the neighbourhood trying to catch the dog because for some reason he wanted to be defiant and ran off everytime i came near contrary to how he would normally be obedient. he just had to pick a day when i was late to run out and refuse to come back in T_T BEST PART. i was wearing a double layered maxi dress and the sun was super hot.

i swear all the running around, my exercise quota was made.

went to bangsar shopping center and i normally use touch n go but my touch n go didnt have enough credit. ZZZZ

after that nth much happened lar.

but busy non stop until now. its already 12 am and i only had a bit of time for myself just now and i still havent started on my next assignment which i had earlier anticipated that i would have finished by now U_U

actually got a lot more to rant wan but im having headache adi and my arm is aching cuz i have to type with my arms up thanks to my charm bracelets wtf

K THX BYE

so hectic!!!

WHY WHY WHY?!?!?

i cant deal with this!!

AHHHHHH!!!

LIFE ON HOLD.

How am i?

I am cranky, tired and extremely forgetful.

This is what going to school always does to me. Sigh.

Snapping at everything and wanting to go to bed by 10pm.

Hello.

I miss the lazy me that barely flinches at things.

Go away you angsty easily irritable tired me.

Good night world.

Ginny going back into one of her emo rants that you guys are of course never surprised to find.

So how does one find it to be okay to completely neglect to tell their partners that they are going out for dinner to meet their friends and then telling them only about 2 hours before the occasion happens. There was of course and invitation but it included driving there oneself ignoring the fact of course that the venue of the place is less than 15 minutes away from where the poor waiting girlfriend is. Of course i can drive there but i don’t see the point of driving in 2 seperate cars to the same place and driving back in 2 seperate cars when its so damn near.

What i dont get is this. It’s perfectly okay to be late for anything related to said partner (late being half an hour to even 3-4 hours) but not okay to be late for said very good friends?

i guess in most circumstances im being absolutely unreasonable and i should of course just drive there myself but when you spent the night crying and then listening to sorrys that barely even justifies itself one would unaccountably be pissed off even more when instead of following instincts and fleeing somewhere else, one decides to stupidly go home and wait patiently at home as one always does anyway.

But whoop de doo. Mistake of the year because it was discovered making a short detour to get me is way too much hassle and it’s okay to make me wait but never okay to make others wait. =)

Most of the time, i think my immunity level has gone up but lately, i keep wondering to myself; perhaps it’s time to stop.

This level of breakage was just the tipping point of what’s already almost full to the brim. That one little leaf that could make the whole tower come crashing down but of course nobody notices. Nobody.

Especially not him.

Nobody but the tired circles under my eyes and that dull aching pain of familiarity.

I’ve finally found some time to blog again as promised though it will most likely be a wordy post which most of you never bother reading anyway.

Just a random update but here’s what I’ve been up to recently.

I’ve finally gone back to school and in all honesty I’m not really enjoying myself all that much at all. It isn’t the subjects or the lecturers but me and school just don’t gel very well together. Heck, i can easily wake up at 5am to work or at 6am to eat breakfast or even to go swimming but asking me to get up at 7am to go to class at 8am is a whole new feat all together that i have yet to master. Sitting in a classroom or a lecture hall and trying to pay attention drains so much of my energy on a daily basis that i’m normally down and out by 10pm the same day and that is after i’ve taken a 1-2 hour nap in the afternoon after my classes.

Aiya, i know i’ve only gone for a week of classes and already I’m such a whiny bitch but i really can’t help it wei and ironically enough, the only reason i am able to blog now is because somehow for some unknown reason, I’ve managed to get sick and am lying in bed with a fever instead of freezing myself in the classroom. Actually I’m wondering how much more i can even type because my head is starting to spin. HAHHAHA but i shall persevere and go on typing at least a little more just so everyone knows I’m really alive and I’ve not abandoned this blog yet!

Aside from that, did i tell you guys about my addiction with body balance class? It made me lose like 4 KGS in just over 2 weeks. I went about 3-4 times a week but i have to give up most of my classes now since class has started. SAD. And after not going for a week I’ve gone back to developing my sloth like abilities of having my thoughts battle it out inside my brain about whether to get up and go for a session or stay home and lump myself in front of the TV with what’s left of my precious time. Which if you think about it is really a lot of time left seeing as I’ve only got 3 days of classes but those 3 days of classes are making my other days fly by like the wind and all of a sudden it’s time for class again??

I wonder if there’s something i could use to make myself love going to lectures and tutorials. Perhaps i should try a self hypnosis?

OH OH OH!!!

I went to Penang for the first time since i was last there when i was probably 5 with no recollection of the place and i must say that I LOVE PENANG!! wtf wtf. I don’t really know why but that place just feels really familiar and comfortable to me and it’s one of those little cities that i could go wondering about and plopping myself in some random cafe and just stare out at nothing. I guess because it has such a seaside town feel to it and I’m just crazy addicted to the sea. AIYA I KNOW LA ITS NEXT TO THE SEA but what i mean is the infrastructure and the pace of the place lar!!

And for the record, i really didn’t think the Lorong Selamat Char Kuey Teow was all that. SOOOOO overpriced!! There used to be this kopitiam in Aman Suria opened by a penang family and homaigad their char kuey teow is to die for wei!! If you had anything to do with hypertune, you’d likely find the hypertune boys sitting there having their daily dose of it. I’m still devastated that the place closed down and i no longer no where they are. If anyone knows do tell me okay!

And and and I’m addicted to this jagung bakar special thing i ate in Penang. MY goodness it was soooo goooooodd! they actually roasted the corn with some special sauce that caramelises a little to give a sweet and smoky taste to the corn. Just thinking about it is making me salivate and that is on my first thing to eat list if i ever go back to penang again. I got it at a stall in Batu Feringgi outside Sunset Bistro. MUST TRY I SWEAR TO YOU!

Eh okay la. cannot type anymore. nauseas already.

BYE!

As the tragedy of being a sucker for cute things would have it, I was reminded that I wanted a recipe where I could make use of my now “missing” cookie cutters. They’re around. I’m just not entirely sure where. And reading the reviews further about the many mishaps of using cookie cutters and the dough warming up into a goey mess faster in humid countries, I was rather detoured from my initial plan remembering the amount of effort and chilling time I’ve gone through in the past.

You see. Me and rolled sugar cookies just don’t do so well together. I like to take my time baking. And hence my dough always softens much too quickly. Added with the fact my cookies always turn out like shortbread and end up crumbling in your hands if held too hard, I was beginning to doubt my decision. Don’t get me wrong here. My cookies almost always taste awesome but I really just want a more solid sugar cookie I can randomly trash around in containers and frost without having to worry about it crumbling if I poke at it too hard. In my mind, I really hadn’t envisioned my sugar cookies to be crumbly and function like short bread where it actually melts in your mouth. “=_= I want that crisp breaking and that sugary goodness that induces hallucinations of sugar rushed minds.

Maybe I just haven’t found the right recipe, though this may have room for question since I pretty much never follow recipes anyway. The rebellious child in me always just has to tweak everything in accordance to my mood which more often than not is forgotten again the next time I try to bake the same thing. However if you ask around, I think I’m pretty hell good as a cook and a baker from my random throwing in of ingredients despite what my writing seems to want to imply.

Back to the point of the story. So while I was beginning to doubt my decision of making these supposedly simple cookies, it occured to me that I really didn’t have a choice. The inevitable had happened. In the midst of all that sugary thoughts, I had somehow developed a craving. A craving for that sugar cookie shaped like some random item that taste only like what home made sugar cookies can taste like. I am now stuck with that stupid craving no forms of store bought or commercialized cookies can replace.

I need my sugar cookies.

Posted with WordPress for BlackBerry.

So the story was like this.

i went for a casting call at Shiroku Productions for the recent Tutti Fruitti Froyo ad being shown on TV. i didn’t get the main or the featured but they called me up and asked if i could do a favour by helping out as an extra. i figured why not. its not like i had anything better to do with my life anyway and being an extra was infinitely less work or SO I THOUGHT.

Even before production i was required to attend a fitting session with their full Tutti Fruitti uniform and this itself was surprising as it is considering that from all my experiences being a features as well as an extra this normally doesnt happen for an extra. i shrugged it off and went ahead anyway since the place was so near where i was staying. the day of the production was another mess all together. i was surprised to notice that the make up artist was my own agent even “=_= but thought nothing of it again.

IN FACT NOTHING OCCURRED TO ME until me and another guy who was also an extra in the tutti fruitti uniform were required to do our own individual picture shoot kind of thing will FULL FRONTAL FACE EXPOSURES. the ad was meant to be like a cartoon kind of thing so they used pictures instead of it being entirely a video. Me and the other guy were really surprised and we started talking about it. i finally went up to my agent and asked why this was happening because i thought we were just extras in the background. This surprised her as well and she went and had a talk with the production house and wtf they had the dumbest explanation ever!!!

I was told that it was all just for the client to see and they wont really use us in the ad but there was internal complications and they had to appear to look like we were being featured as well or some crap like that. i tried demanding for a pay raise because extras get basically peanuts for the fact that we do not even have to agree to having ourselves shown because WE ARE SUPPOSE TO APPEAR NON EXISTENT IN THE BACKGROUND. the other guy was a really nice and shy fella and he didn’t really dare to bring it up but he was definitely unhappy about the whole situation as well and kept urging me to ask about it and so i did multiple times which i guess stressed everyone out especially the production company.

i saw the ads today and they had 2 different versions. the other extra had a lot of face time and i really hope they paid him later on for it or something but i reaaallly doubt it because even the mains and featured didnt exactly get much. hell, he even appeared in both versions!!! he’s the tall guy in the tutti fruitti uniform that is like the ambassador ya. NOW YOU tell me does that look like a role of an extra to you!?!

and then i found myself in the traffic jam ad as well. ONLY IT WAS JUST MY BODY because my face had been replaced by someone elses. their own staff for that matter of fact. why didnt you idiots just do that in the beginning then?? i have a suspicion they were afraid to use my original pic because of the scene i had already created during production itself. but i really think everything had been handled very unprofessionally. and its impossible that the pic was taken again because i was there the entire time and the other talents in the picture had left way before me.

here are the 2 ads btw.

Productions houses like Shiroku Productions really give malaysian companys a bad name wei. and such a horrible ad seriously “=_= not like the ice cream is some cheap ice cream can find on the streets. i think its even more expensive than haagan dazs wei!!!